If you’re new to this Substack, one of the things I’m offering subscribers in 2023 is A Year with Jane. We’re reading through Austen’s six novels this year and Sense & Sensibility is our read for August and September.
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The Secret Is Out
In this week’s reading, the secret of Lucy and Edward’s engagement is finally out. Elinor is now (finally!) at liberty to tell Marianne the whole story of discovering the engagement (and the mindgames Lucy played to try to determine if there was an attachment between Elinor and her fiance).
The difference in how each sister has reacted to bitter disappointment and heartbreak is highlighted in their conversation. Elinor has prevented compounding grief by how cautiously she viewed her attachment to Edward from the very start. From the beginning, she was careful not to get swept away. Marianne thought her attitude was cold and ridiculous. But Elinor knew that even if Edward returned her feelings as she thought he did, the road forward would be rocky. She could not let herself get carried away imagining a future together before that future was promised to her despite her very strong feelings for him. This would do harm to her and possibly to him as well.
And then when the dreadful truth is presented to her by the jealous Lucy, Elinor does not wallowed in her misery. Instead, she focuses on Marianne’s sorrow and attempts to alleviate it and support her in any way she can. She might be tempted to feast on her unhappiness as Marianne has, but she is motivated by her duty to the people she loves.
There are, of course, always going to be some differences in the way we react to painful things. Marianne is and will always be a more emotional person than Elinor. There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s simply the temperament she was born with. But her dismissiveness of Elinor’s pain comes with a strong reproach—perhaps the most forthright speech from Elinor in the whole novel! When Marianne suggests that Elinor is doing so well because she simply didn’t feel as deeply, Elinor disabuses her of that notion immediately. She assures Marianne that if she had not considered it her duty to keep the secret, there would have been no doubt of her suffering and that she has only been able to push through this pain through great “exertion.”
Recovering from a heartbreak like this requires hard work. Elinor has been strengthened by her love for the people who care for her which has prevented her from giving herself up to her grief. Marianne has chosen the easier path, but that path causes so much pain for Elinor and others. As we see in the chapters that follow, Marianne’s inability to exert herself almost leads to her death because she has given herself over to despair.
This novel is a critique of the idea that the most virtuous way to navigate our emotions is to give them free rein—an idea that remains popular today. Emotions are an essential part of being a human being, but they should be governed by our duty to other people. I’m reminded of the story that St. Therese of Lisieux tells about when she was a child and she overheard her father, tired after a long day, saying that he hoped this was the last year they’d need to make a big Christmas to do for young Therese. She was tempted to have an emotional meltdown, but instead, she decided that she could let the comment go. (It was never meant to be overheard by her in the first place.) She decided to come down the stairs to celebrate Christmas happily so that nothing would be ruined for the rest of her family. Her love was stronger than her disappointment.
Does this mean that we should keep our feelings all bottled up inside? No, and I don’t think Austen is suggesting that, either. Elinor’s experience of being sworn to secrecy was an unusual and terrible situation—certainly not the norm. Once she can tell Marianne her sorrows, she tells her everything. We aren’t required to repress our feelings, but neither are we to let them dictate the course of our lives or overwhelm our duty to our loved ones.
Discussion Question: What do you make of Elinor and Marianne’s differing methods of navigating emotions? Is Elinor’s defense of the depth of her own unhappiness believable? Why do you think Marianne is tempted to be dismissive of Elinor’s feelings?
(Chime in by replying to this post.)
Bonus Question: What do you think of Mrs. Jennings? (I love her more each time I read S&S.) What are her flaws? Despite those flaws, do you think she’s a good person?
Reading schedule:
August 5th:
Gather your books. There are many editions out there, so just grab what’s on your shelf or at the local library. And if you enjoy audiobooks, this is an excellent novel to enjoy with a great narrator. My favorite for this novel is Juliet Stevenson’s audiobook version. Grab Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life from Ave Maria Press (use STEWART20 for 20% off) or from Amazon.
If you didn’t start reading with us in January, you may want to catch up by reading the Introduction and Chapters 1-4 of Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life to set the stage.
Read by August 13th:
Chapters 1-11 of Sense & Sensibility
Read by August 20th:
Chapters 12-22 of Sense & Sensibility
Read by August 27th:
Chapters 23-29 of Sense & Sensibility
Read by September 3rd:
Chapters 30-36 of Sense & Sensibility
Read by September 10th:
Chapters 37-43 of Sense & Sensibility
Read by September 17th:
Chapters 44-50 of Sense & Sensibility
Read by September 24th:
Chapter 4 of Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life
Caveat:
On the reading schedule I have suggested reading the chapter about Sense & Sensibility after finishing the novel. This is because as a reader I hate spoilers. But if you’ve already read the novel or are familiar with the story and want a resource to help you dive deeper as you re-read it, feel free to read Chapter 5 of Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life first.
I’ll be sending out weekly reflections and discussion questions to consider as you read. If you want to read faster or slower, go for it. This is fun, not homework.
If you know someone who would enjoy reading Austen with us for our Year of Jane, please share this post with him/her!
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Enjoy reading the next few chapters of Sense & Sensibility!
Haley
(Editor of Word on Fire Spark, Author, Former Podcaster)
Haley’s Children’s Mystery Series about Mouse Nuns
Haley’s Book on Jane Austen’s Novels
Haley’s Book about Radical Simplicity
I love what you pointed out about Elinor’s duty to her loved ones! I never thought of it in that way before. Does her position in the family as eldest, and her mother’s right hand helper, and sometimes caretaker, give Elinor the reason and strength to resist the temptation to let her feelings go. Her personality, no doubt, helps. But her duty to be dependable is motivation. Marianne has no such inducement to dependability. She is not only emotional by nature, but independent by habit--in terms of feeling free to set aside conventions for the sake of her feelings. I have often thought that our modern American focus on independence misses the traditional value of dependability. Elinor is needed by her mother and sisters and that serves her well in motivating her to more responsible behavior. Marianne feels no such pull to being dependable, and therefore feels free to act in what she sees as her own self interest--which leads her astray since she hasn’t the wisdom to discern her true self interest.
I wonder if the contrast between how they handle emotions is due to the fact that when one person is extreme in their emotions, those who naturally feel responsible will struggle to express their own. They judge that there is not “room” for them to be emotional too because if everything fell apart then where would we be. I tend to think that depending on which end of the spectrum you fall on, the virtuous path is in either learning more self control and restraint or trusting that your emotions are also valid. And it requires a lot of patience for naturally passionate people to make room for the more restrained to have their feelings aired out. But it also requires a trust and vulnerability for the “strong and sensible” to admit they are human. Marianne does annoy me a little, but that probably has to do with my own baggage of being the Elinor of the family 😅