Being Annoying Isn't a Sin
Miss Bates, Dramatic Picnics, A Year of Jane (Emma)
If you’re new to this Substack, one of the things I’m offering subscribers in 2023 is A Year with Jane. We’re reading through Austen’s six novels this year and Emma is our read for March and April.
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Last week we read chapters 37-45 of Jane Austen’s Emma. And here is your weekly reflection on Emma. My apologies for not sending this out Sunday as promised. But I was hit by a terrible flu on Friday and was still a bit too Nyquiled to trust my writing skills this weekend. Thankfully, I’m back in business today after spending 72 hours in bed watching Miss Scarlet and the Duke.
“There is not a better creature in the world…”
Oh Miss Bates! One of the funniest parts of this week’s reading is the section of Miss Bates’s commentary at the ball. She is so ridiculously hilarious! But also, so very sweet. I thought that Miranda Hart was hysterical in the most recent adaptation of Emma, but alas, did not get the screen time she deserved.
Tamsin Greig was also wonderful in the role in my favorite adaptation starring Romola Garai. Greig really highlighted Miss Bates’s tender soul, vulnerability, and kindness.
And then Sophie Thompson was also delightfully quirky and awkward in the Gwyneth adaptation. (And my family is in the habit of yelling “pork!” “angel!” and “upon my honor!”)
Miss Bates is comically annoying. She can’t stop talking. She has no social awareness of how irritating her constant chattering is to those around her. But she is so dear, so charitable, so well-intentioned. And despite her silliness, her community values her—with a notable exception: Emma. And it all comes to a head at the picnic at Box Hill.
The Picnic That Changes Everything
The scene at Box Hill is the hinge of the whole story. There is drama at this picnic. But this is Austen, so there is no screaming, there are no knife fights, there’s nothing particularly shocking. This is like real life and the situations we all encounter on a regular basis. (Austen is all about the small things that matter very much.)
Emma is annoyed that the Eltons are there, being awful as usual. Miss Fairfax is clearly unsettled, Frank is being flirtatious and bad-tempered in a confusing way. This picnic is simply not going well. And in a moment of irritation, Emma says something she later regrets very much. She makes fun of poor Miss Bates’s propensity to chatter. She highlights how grating this characteristic is. While not premeditated, her comment is cruel, humiliating, and devastating to a lifelong friend.
As Mr. Knightley tells her, “Badly done, Emma!” And Emma does not realize how cruel she has been until Mr. Knightley confronts her. For the first time we see Emma understand her flaws. Someone whose unfortunate situation is already a cross to bear deserves Emma’s particular care and compassion. Instead, she is treated with disdain. Emma realizes that not only in this moment, but in her behavior in general to Miss Bates, she has been uncharitable and unkind. While she was mortified by her misjudgment about Harriet and Mr. Elton, this moment is different. She is truly distressed and not only is she struck by the unpleasant truth about herself, she immediately tries to make amends.
Last week I wrote about Mr. Knightley’s clear vision, his prudence or good judgment. In his intervention in this moment regarding Emma’s behavior, it is almost as if she has the opportunity to borrow his lenses that make his perception of the world clear. Emma puts on the “glasses” of humility and sees herself and Miss Bates quite differently. While Miss Bates’s endless chatter is annoying, having annoying quirks isn’t a crime. Her behavior is innocuous. She is kind, thoughtful, generous, and forgiving. Emma, on the other hand, is elegant. Her company is pleasant (although her behavior is often very frustrating). But, she lacks the kindness of soul that Miss Bates possesses. She misuses her wit for manipulation and cruelty. But to her credit, when she realizes this unpleasant truth, she tries to change.
There is so much to unpack in this section, but I think there is much to learn from Miss Bates. She is full of gratitude for her friends, her family, and any small blessings in her life rather than being bitter about her situation. She is eager to celebrate any good thing that happens in the life of her friends. She is quick to forgive slights and unkind remarks and wants to assume the best of everyone. She in tenderhearted toward anyone experiencing pain or suffering. Miss Bates is a jewel.
For our discussion questions this week: Is it appropriate for Mr. Knightley to confront Emma about her behavior? Why do you think he decides to do this (even when he finds it very unpleasant)?
This week we’ll finish reading the book!
If a Janeite friend just urged you to join our Emma book club, welcome! I’m an author of books for both children and grown-ups, a Florida native who spent 13 years in Texas, mom of four kids ages 4-14, and wife to a whisky distiller. I’m the Editor of Word on Fire Spark so I like to think of my work as literary midwifery—helping bring new beautiful creations into the world. And for the purposes of this post about Austen, it might be good to know that I wrote a book called Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life: On Love, Friendship, and Becoming the Person God Created You to Be.
Reading schedule:
Week of March 5th:
Gather your books. There are many editions out there, so just grab what’s on your shelf or at the local library. And if you enjoy audiobooks, this is an excellent novel to enjoy with a great narrator. My favorite for this novel is Juliet Stevenson’s audiobook version. Grab Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life from Ave Maria Press (use STEWART20 for 20% off) or from Amazon.
If you didn’t start reading with us in January, you may want to catch up by reading the Introduction and Chapters 1-2 of Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life to set the stage.
Week of March 12th:
Chapters 1-9 of Emma
Week of March 19th:
Chapters 10-18 of Emma
Week of March 26th:
Chapters 19-27 of Emma
Week of April 2nd:
Chapters 28-36 of Emma
Week of April 9th:
Chapters 37-45 of Emma
Week of April 16th:
Chapters 46-54 of Emma
Week of April 23rd:
Chapter 3 of Jane Austen’s Genius Guide to Life
TBA: Zoom Discussion with special guests, Marcia Lane-McGee and Shannon Wimp Schmidt.
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Looking forward to discussing more of Emma with you!
Haley
(Editor of Word on Fire Spark, Author, Former Podcaster)
Haley’s Children’s Mystery Series about Mouse Nuns
Haley’s Book on Jane Austen’s Novels
Haley’s Book about Radical Simplicity
You know, what I thought of most clearly while reading this reflection was of one particular extended family member who is annoying in similar ways to Miss Bates... with the added charm of anxiety around it, which makes this person kind of a pill to be around. And yet, like Miss Bates, this person is unfathomably generous. We all sort of have that dismissive, derisive way of talking about this person, even if not face to face. So this was quite the personal challenge. Being annoying is not a sin, indeed.
I've always thought Miss Bates was difficult, because she really is SO ANNOYING. And yet the qualities you flagged--her generosity and gratitude! That is heroism, in a person who has had so little in the way of privilege in her life. Maybe we find her annoying because she pricks our conscience.
Or maybe she's just clueless. But if so, she's clueless in the way of "bring the little children to me."
None of that has a thing to do with your question. Of course, it's appropriate for Mr. Knightley--her only clear-eyed friend--to challenge her. And he does it in the Gospel way: tell your friend in private. He doesn't humiliate her in public "so she'll know how it feels." He follows the Gospel. And it's wonderful that it works. That hardly ever works in modern life, does it? (Hello Facebook arguments.) I guess the takeaway is that challenging someone is more likely to work when there is a relationship of love and care already established.
I remember so clearly seeing this scene in the theater when the Paltrow version came out. I had not read the book, and I suspect most of the audience had not either. At that time (and now) TV and movies was filled with gotcha comedy lines, where mean remarks were always laughed at. But, this scene, when Emma makes her remark, left the audience in stunned silence. Everyone felt for Miss Bates! And when Knightly corrects Emma, we all felt for her, though I think we all felt the justice of his words. Now having read all of Jane Austen (that movie led me down the path quite quickly!) I can see the great value of Knightly’s friendship and love for Emma in that one scene. The young adults in our house have all seen and loved that courageous moment of Knightly’s. True friendship!